Personal Reflection & Prayer

For most of my life, I felt overlooked.

The world did not choose me.
Or it chose me briefly—and then let me go.

I grew up with only two dreams that I can remember.

One was to be a librarian. I loved words, learning, and truth. This year, I have studied nonstop—not surrounded by shelves of books, but immersed in Scripture. What I longed for was never a profession. It was understanding.

The other dream was to be a pastor’s wife. I wanted a Christian marriage, a Christian family, and a shared life of faith lived out together.

That dream did not unfold as I imagined.

I am divorced twice.
I am permanently disabled.
And for a long time, I believed the life I hoped for had passed me by.

Yet here—at what feels like the end—I found something far greater than I ever knew how to ask for.

I found love in Jesus.

Not conditional love.
Not love that depends on performance.
Not love that leaves.

The world did not leave me empty.
It made room.

My dreams were not destroyed.
They were transformed.

Instead of becoming a keeper of books, I became a student of the Word.
Instead of becoming a pastor’s wife, I became something eternal:

The Bride of Christ.

Both dreams fulfilled.
Just not the way I expected. (That’s God for ya.)

Anchoring Scripture

“Let us rejoice and be glad and give Him glory,
for the marriage of the Lamb has come,
and His bride has made herself ready.”
— Revelation 19:7

A Prayer of Surrender and Gratitude

Lord,

You saw me when I felt unseen.
You stayed when others left.
You fulfilled my deepest longings in ways I could not imagine.

If any part of my story brings glory to You, let it remain.
If any part distracts from Your truth, let it fade.

I surrender what I thought my life would be
for what You have made it.

I choose truth over comfort,
faith over fear,
and You over every former dream.

Thank You for loving me completely.

Amen.

Miss Bess